Tall Drink of Water

What’s a tall drink of water doin’ With short, fat, balding me anyway? Why does she want to be with me Until my final dying day? I’m not rich, handsome or suave In fact I’m a bit of an obnoxious slob Who likes hot dogs & corn on the cob She stays instead of runningContinue reading “Tall Drink of Water”

Soon, You’ll Have Tacos

We were driving in the middle of nowhere With the windows open and I felt her stare We were starving and she wanted Taco Bell I couldn’t agree more, I wanted it as well I said soon, Babe, soon Soon, Soon Soon, Soon You’ll have tacos Oh yeah – Soon, you’ll have tacos The signContinue reading “Soon, You’ll Have Tacos”

Baseball On My Brain

Inspired by Chuck Brodsky and Philip Bechis Clark You say I’m acting different now You say I’m getting really weird You say I’m a bit too obsessive It’s not as bad as you feared No, I’m not going crazy I haven’t gone insane I’m just excited about Opening Day It’s Major League Baseball on myContinue reading “Baseball On My Brain”

Your Guess Is As Good As Mine

You ask me why I love you Why I’m always thinking of you Why your kisses are better than wine I couldn’t even tell you Why I love to smell you Your guess is as good as mine It could be your bright eyes Or that attractive hip size Or your smile, how it shinesContinue reading “Your Guess Is As Good As Mine”

Skin Tag Blues

I’ve got the Skin Tag Blues I’ve got the Skin Tag Blues They’re all over my feet That’s why I don’t like wearin’ shoes Skin Tag Blues Skin Tag Blues There’s nothin’ I can do ‘bout these Skin Tag Blues Skin tags  on my belly Skin tags on my back Skin tags on the napeContinue reading “Skin Tag Blues”

Sand In Our Cracks

Sand in our cracks Breathing the ocean breeze As we’re makin’ sweet memories With Hawaiian Tropic oil on our sun kissed backs and warm white sand in our cracks Tired of bein’ at home Tired of stayin’ inside Wanna get outta this place Where the water is wide Where the fun never stops As weContinue reading “Sand In Our Cracks”

When It Comes To Shaving

I’m happy with wearing plain clothes I don’t need logos on them to feel great I’m fine with simple decor in our home I don’t mind eating off a paper plate But there’s one thing I won’t ever negotiate When it comes to shaving I’ll always need to use a brush and soap I won’tContinue reading “When It Comes To Shaving”

If You’re Looking For My Heart

I don’t know if you even care though you’re sittin’ with me here With me at this bowling alley bar and you just ordered me a cold beer I’m not used to forward women But before we even start It’s been thrown in the trash If you’re looking for my heart It’s been thrown inContinue reading “If You’re Looking For My Heart”

I’m No Garth Brooks, But…

I’m tired of Standing Outside The Fire Thinkin’ of That Summer & That Ol’ Wind And I’ve been sick of Burning Bridges and Unanswered Prayers again and again I might be goin’ Against The Grain now but I want to be your only Mr. Right For that’s when We Shall Be Free Cause we’ll findContinue reading “I’m No Garth Brooks, But…”